i miss you, like every day

i will never ever EVER get over that these amazing magazines folded. they were edgy, unapologetic, and so girl positive [at least in my memories...] i am grateful for growing up in the 90s and being super-aware of women's issues and POC issues. i was always an intersectional feminist even when i didn't know it had a name. 

now as i watch A Different World and reflect back on Roseanne, The Spice Girls, Christina Aguilera's Dirrrty phase, and more, i think about how people can deny their true selves all the time, but we shine brighter when we allow ourselves to be playful and truthful.

when i have sons and daughters, I can't wait to introduce them to my world and ask them to teach me about theirs. 

the above magazines are now-defunct publications that i read every month, that shaped me, that were the epitome of "cool," that taught me about magazine writing, fashion, how to think for myself, and who my role models were. today if i had one dream, it would be to bring these magazines back!!!

off to do some daydreaming now....

Today I am celebrating Being Yourself

Being yourself is one of the most courageous ways to live. If you think it's hard being yourself and there is no way you can do it, think about how much pressure you put on yourself every time you pretend to be something you're not.

On the TVLand show Younger, Liza is a forty year old woman pretending to be twenty six so she can have her dream job, her dream boyfriend, and a "second chance" at life. Yet even though she now has the job, the man, and the life she dreamed of, she feels like a fraud. Not only does she have to lie every day to the outside world, but now she has friends and a lover she can only be so real with.

It is so hard to feel like a fraud. To feel like you are nothing, you're ugly, you're stupid, you're just pretending to be something you're not. For so many of us, myself included a lot of the time, looking in the mirror is a chore. Depression, anxiety, and Impostor Syndrome are real things. You don't feel connected to yourself or the world around you. And even if you remember that the times you've been the happiest were the times you let go, accepted yourself, and lived harmoniously, you just can't shake off the insecurities.

I think the first step is opening your eyes to realizing that everyone can be captured by these feelings and thoughts even if just for a moment. Even the most confident, gorgeous person in the world, someone who literally glows from within, can wake up and feel ugly sometimes. It's so easy to throw yourself under the bus. It's like when you see the same friend every day, and maybe their quirks become irksome - you inhabit your own body and mind 24/7 and you can irk yourself. But it's important to remember:

No one else can ever be you. You are loved. You have something to offer this world. You can do this. You are beautiful, and smart, and kind, and most importantly, you are unique. A fingerprint that cannot be replicated.

Don't let yourself get too down.